I hope the title of this post deceived you. I have to admit, I’m a little frustrated. The majoraty of people who find this blog via Google or some other search engine, find it by searching for things related to the X3 Watch accountability software. But it’s not because they (and possibly you) are interested in installing it, or what it does, but rather how to get around it. They want to know how they can turn off the software without it notifying the accountability parters, or just simply how to look at porn without being caught.
This assumes that they already have it installed, and if they have it installed, it’s because they (at least on the outside) want some help in the right direction – to not look at porn. So for them, or you, it’s all a facade. You don’t really want to change. You just want people to think you do.
Consider these lyrics from As Cities Burn – a song called “Terrible! How Terrible For The Great City”.
am I a monster when I sink my teeth into her
when I don’t love her
no, I don’t love you
forgive me darling, but love has nothing to do with this
it has nothing to do with how I can’t stop
until I get what I want from you
this is what real men keep quiet
it doesn’t exist if you can hide it behind your teeth
and sleep at night next to your wife
who you love too much to tell her
you don’t love her at all
I just feel as empty as the lungs
of those waiting in the womb
do you feel as empty as the lungs of those waiting
to come into this world
where being beautiful means being used
how long will we blame the devils on our shoulders
and pose like angels on the outside
when all I am is a monster
I have some compassion for people who look at porn, but don’t want to. If you are trying to get around X3 Watch, that is just a symptom of a bigger problem. You can’t just try harder, you’ll fail. If not the first time, you will eventually. You need something bigger and better than yourself to help you if you intend to stop.
Leave some comments if you want to talk. I’ve been there.
To start I would say that X3watch has unfortunately made itself so easily circumventable that it fails deliver the airtight accountability its users often seek. There are better software options out there for accountability that won’t leave gaping wide holes that tempt the average Internet user to jump through.
Second, I would say that you are very right. Accountability software is meant for those who want to leverage technology to help them avoid porn, and who are seeking help from those around them if/when they sin (via accountability, confession, prayer, discipleship, etc.). If someone is trying to get around software in order to put up a front, then yes, this is a symptom of a much larger issue.
As someone who struggled to be set free from pornography addiction for years, I can identify with the loneliness of the battle, the utter frustration, the confusion, and the sadness of bondage. Of course it was an addiction that was entirely my own fault, entirely chosen by me, stemming from a rebellious heart, chosen to mask and medicate some of the deeper sin and pain in me. And I am so thankful for the process of recovery and repentance the Lord has brought me through.
I found this page because I wanted to find out if X3Watch could be turned off before I install it. If it can be turned off then I won’t bother installing it because I know I will end up disabling it.
Like you, I too ” claim to love Jesus, but often don’t act like it.”
I am a Web/Graphic Designer so by neccesity work at my computer a lot. Can you offer me any advice on decent software… or just let me know there is light at the end of the tunnel.
I can go for months without falling to the temptation then have a really bad week. I pray about it daily.
I have a beautiful wife who I do love. I just can’t shake off the old man, I know we can do nothing without the help of the Lord. Please pray for me.
Yours in Christ,
Anonymous
Hey man, first off…there is hope! I can’t (unfortunately) give you something specific, and I don’t want to be trite either.
You must know by now that just “trying harder” will eventually fail.
You can turn x3 watch off easily, but whoever you have set as your accountability partner(s) will be notified in the report of time you shut it off. It isn’t meant to keep you from it, but to discourage you. My only issue with software that does all the work for you is that it hasn’t changed your heart, and it doesn’t allow you to make the decision. This hasn’t fixed the issue, but only masked it.
Maybe this is good for some folks at the beginning, but as soon as you have a moment on another computer, there isn’t anything to stop you and you’re weak.
I have my wife as the person who gets my report…thats good cause I DO NOT want that poping up in her inbox, but it it’s also way hard, because if I do screw up, the one it hurts the most is the one who finds out.
This is getting long enough for a whole post, so I’ll cut to the chase. There is a light!
I have been ‘good’ for a while now, but there have been days, or weeks where the temptation is so unbelievably strong…it’s like a little devil on my back just egging me on, relentlessly.
I have learned that if I wait around long enough, I’ll give in. So I have to just get off the computer…and do something, anything else.
I too am on a computer (24/7 it seems) working on web sites in some form or fashion, but there was a point when I considered the extreme of getting into a whole other career for the sake of purity.
It an extreme solution, but Jesus was not joking when he said we should lop off hands or gouge out eyes if they cause us to stumble. The point here isn’t to mutilate yourself, but to, if necessary, take extreme measures for the sake of righteousness.
I just encourage you to press on, and most important, press in. To Christ. Cliche maybe, but if we are focused on ANYTHING other than our desperate need for Him, Satan is happy that we have missed the point entirely.
Does that help, at all? Or did I just ramble?! Praying for you, whoever you are.
Thank you so much for this post. I’m on the road and doing just fine, when the tempting thought comes to me. I tried to disable my X3 watch several times – but I failed. I believe finding this site is God speaking to me, leading me.
I can sooo relate to Anon when he says “I can go for months without falling to the temptation then have a really bad week. I pray about it daily.
I have a beautiful wife who I do love.” and to Steve when he says “I have my wife as the person who gets my report…thats good cause I DO NOT want that poping up in her inbox, but it it’s also way hard, because if I do screw up, the one it hurts the most is the one who finds out.”
I’m in the same boat. Man – a big part of it for me too is the deception. “Blessed are the pure in hear, for they shall see God” We must be pure – transparent, honest, in order to see God’s blessings around us. Deception blinds us and guilt parylyzes us. The good news is that blessings follow temptation endured. We can STAND in CHRIST when we lean on Him as our strength.
These quotes from Mary Baker Eddy, along with my daily prayer and scriptural study, have helped me:
“Selfishness and sensualism are educated in mortal mind by the thoughts ever recurring to one’s self, by conversation about the body, and by the expectation of perpetual pleasure or pain from it; and this education is at the expense of spiritual growth.”
It seems that these tempting thoughts are “ever recurring” and are reinforced by our media and our culture. But only sorrow comes from indulging these temptations, and they cannot be overcome through will power!
“Sorrow for wrong-doing is but one step towards reform and the very easiest step. The next and great step required by wisdom is the test of our sincerity, namely, reformation. To this end we are placed under the stress of circumstances. Temptation bids us repeat the offence, and woe comes in return for what is done. So it will ever be, till we learn that there is no discount in the law of justice and that we must pay “the uttermost farthing.” The measure ye mete “shall be measured to you again,” and it will be full “and running over.”
Thank you again – keep praying, not only for youselves, but for all sincere seekers earnestly working to get past this addiction and to lead a life of purity.
I found this site because I suspect my husband has found a way around the x3 watch we have installed on our computer. I hesitated even looking into this further because I feel it’s a waste of time, which completely breaks my heart to it’s very deepest center. He is immersed so deeply into this addiction that he doesn’t even know how strong the grip is. Maybe I’m wrong, maybe he does know and he just doesn’t care. I feel some sort of disconnect in him. He thinks he can hide this, he really tries. But as his wife, his soul mate, I can feel it no matter what he does to try and hide it. I’m stuck in a place where I feel I have to decide weather I stay in this marriage or let it go. WE have dealt with his addiction for the past 2 years and I feel it has taken as much of a grip on my life as is has his. I want my husband back. I want my family to survive this but I just feel so hopeless that it will. The wives seem to be a lost casualty of this war. It seems like this is a topic that no one wants to address. There are many areas a man can go for help but what about us? What about the women who lay next to you at night and hear your dreams as you talk in your sleep? How about the women who are downstairs fixing dinner knowing the whole time what you are really doing upstairs locked in the bathroom? What about OUR hearts that break? What about OUR souls that need healing? I can love my husband through any imperfection and any failure, but for him to deny that his addiction affects me is possibly the most painful scar of all. So here I am…searching for answers and I end up here? Not sure why? I guess I’m not really looking for any of you to give answers…just be aware…be aware that there is a forgotten wounded heart that breaks when you continue to choose sin over grace.
[...] close to home and obvious damage that takes place when you look at porn. A woman named Amy just commented on a post from a while back about x3 Watch about how porn killing her – all because her husband is [...]
I found this site while struggling with exactly what you are talking about: the desire to look at porn without my accountability partner finding out. Thanks for this. Reading it helped me to think things through a little more.
What really matters is having a clean conscience before God. Lying to my accountability partner by disabling x3watch is definitely a sign of a worse problem, and now that you made me think about it, it’s not something I want to do.
I’ve been free from porn and erotic stories for many months now, thanks to God, my accountability partner, and X3watch. But that doesn’t stop the desire to look at it “just one more time”. I’d rather not say how many times I have queried up porn or erotic stories on Google and then didn’t open the links because I knew I’d have to talk with my accountability partner about it. Lately erotic stories have been the more difficult temptation. Maybe I find it easier to justify them in my mind because “I’m not actually looking at porn”.
Please keep this site up. I’m sure it will help other people as well.
BTW, I think accountability software is better than content blockers. Content blockers get in the way of normal, healthy use of the internet, and there is always some material that sneaks through a content blocker. I know because I found it. Accountability software forces me to deal honestly with my problem (as long as I don’t disable the software).
I don’t think it’s possible to build completely bulletproof accountability software or a perfect content blocker. There is always some kind of hole that can be exploited. Again, I know because I did it. Blessings on you and this site.
Thanks for your comments everyone. It helped me have a change of mind and heart to not seek a “workaround”. We must fight with His strength day by day to overcome these temptations.